THE MAGNANIMOUS AND WORSHIPFUL BETELGEUSE CORPORATION Proudly PRESENTS to you…
WORLD RAT!
THE MAGNANIMOUS AND WORSHIPFUL BETELGEUSE CORPORATION Proudly PRESENTS to you… WORLD RAT!
And now a word from our CEO, Lennon BeTELGEUSE:
“Well, somebody better pour me another glass of Betelgeuse, looks like I need to stick around! If only just to call Ubisoft Games because, Great World-Ending Betel, poor Rayman’s gone and Brundlefluffed himself in a telepod with a whole heap of crap. We’ve got cells! We’ve got roots! We’ve got dice, mice and pyramids! We’ve got floating eyes, people left behind and men jumping at shapes in the sky! I’m not going to give you a full breakdown, that’s what I have a vassal for, I’m busy! This one’s another little one, A5, watercolour on watercolour paper. My great mind spots a trend with the medium. Also, shout out to my homies! Do I see the Greatest Star, Betelgeuse, sending out its red conquering rays into the Cosmos in this painting? I rather fancy I do.”
WhICH Bit do I, Lennon BeTELGEUSE, CEO, Like the Most?
“Thankme for asking. The clear and beautiful representation of the Greatest Star, Betelgeuse quivering and pulsating and raining pure energy down onto the double-globe of Krrrr-kaahrehhhk-krriii *two steps to the left, shuffle right-side of carapace* kkeeeeeeeek-kaahh-kuuuuh *open wings once and bow* kkkkareeeeeeeeeeennklop *defecate minutely*, blessed homeland of the Betels, is my favourite part. But I also like the pyramid which my famous relative, Uncle Betelgeuse, built utilising the forced labour of the ancient humans so he could administer venom-rain directly to their upturned, worshiping faces once it was complete.”
How much WOUld I, Lennon Betelgeuse, BACK-ALLEY NATIONAL GALLERY and HAGGLER WITH LEVEL 78 MERCANTILE SKILL, sell this painting for?
“Alas! Alas! The vassal has performed the Rite of Unbirth, absorbing this painting back into artistic utero. I ordered the subjugated ants to induce the vassal by tunneling through its belly button as it slept, but the vassal thrashed, dreaming in its chains, and crushed them all. Do not worry perturbed perusers, there will be more ants! And I shall take back what is rightfully mine!”
The ORIGINAL HAS BEEN RE-ASSIMILATED BUT PRINTS OF DIFFERENT SIZES ARE AVAILABLE IN THE SHOP
Now tell us, what and why, vassal?
“The Eye of God and Wriggling Serpent preside over the division of Life as it digs its way through the Earth and rises up through the Oceans, relying on instinct and running the risk of high-stakes gambits as predators stalk and swoop. Revel in the joy of success, lament loss and be unthinkingly caught in the rapidly industrialising Cycle of Life as Technology steps forward and takes hold. Species and civilizations rise and fall, decay to compost and ruined monuments. At the tail end, the circuits embed themselves and cybernetic amalgamation is complete.”
You pretentious piece of cod! Don’t make me vomit! You’re supposed to be explaining this painting not waxing your poet’s bush. What is the thing above the jumping man?
“An eye of some sort, or maybe a space-ship.”
Why is the tree sweating?
“I think a lot of trees might be sweating these days.”
Well I concur with Saruman, trees stand in the way of progress! Now tell me how you know of the double-globe world of Krrrr-kaahrehhhk-krriii *two steps to the left, shuffle right-side of carapace* kkeeeeeeeek-kaahh-kuuuuh *open wings once and bow* kkkkareeeeeeeeeeennklop *defecate minutely*, Blessed homeland of the Betels?
“The company away-day.”
WORLD RAT...
A BETELGEUSE CORPORATION PRODUCTION.
WORLD RAT... A BETELGEUSE CORPORATION PRODUCTION.
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